A lighter heart

Week three and I was on my way to TRJE this past Saturday, March 1. Once again, I sat in the car digging through the past week’s events to think of something exciting to share with the group. And…once again….nada. It had been another strained and stressful week and all I really wanted was to be amongst people who didn’t expect anything out of me. As hard as I tried to leave the mass of my life aggravations in the car, they sat on my shoulders as I slammed the door shut. My eyes felt like weighted water balloons and my heart felt like a blob of immense melancholy. That is…until I walked up the steps and into the Cinema Center. I felt a hand on my back, heard an introduction made and saw a reassuring smile from someone who said, “Glad to see you today.” Gears shifted and my solidity took a back seat.
With my burdens left at the door, I took my place in the check-in circle. I looked over at the boy, sitting next to me. He had his sweatshirt over his knees and was mischievously smiling at me. I grinned back.
After everyone read through a typed version of the ensemble rules, another group was called upon to give their assigned presentation. The entire group of three was not prepared as a unit, but one of the collaborators had completed her portion. She presented information pertaining to slave rebellions that took place in New York City in and around 1741. After she finished reading the historical part, she sang a song about freedom. She sang the song standing, without music…accapella… in a room with wood floors and high ceilings.
While sitting on the floor and looking up at her, I was transported out of my selfish self. My spirit lifted and I was humbled. Her voice floating through the silent air was melodious and extremely effective. She was gutsy and bold and it spoke to me. I hope it spoke to everyone on some level. Later, while in the restroom, I heard her singing the song again. I smiled and readied myself for some creative writing.
The students were working to refine previously written pieces with effort to get them ready for possible website publication. Malik shared three of his poems with me. Two of which were possible candidates for the website. The first was his favorite. It was about his first encounter with a current member of TRJE. The poem spoke of his perception of her because her hands were malformed and he did not know how she would be able to play jenbe. As it turned out, she was more able then he gave her credit for and that was the lesson he learned.
We worked on the grammar and punctuation and then I flipped to the third poem. It was an acronym formed from his name and poignantly questioned his purpose. That was my favorite of his poems. It was short, but had a lot of meaning. It left me questioning my own motivations and I liked his honesty.
Then, he asked me if I would like to read the second poem. Of course I did! I was already feeling privileged to have read the other two. The second poem was about a Samurai. At first, I did not realize that was what it was about, which I liked. It allowed me to attach relevancy to it in my own way. I expressed this to Malik and he was happy with my interpretation. After we were finished looking over the poems, we sat and talked about Jenbe and his visit to Africa. We talked about his writing and what writing meant for people…how difficult it is for some and not for others. Then, we shared some stories about how difficult it is to write something meaningful about a topic that we have not experienced ourselves. It was thought provoking and interesting to see things from his point of view.
As I walked out of Jenbe and towards the door, I felt a little lighter in my step. The list that burdened me didn’t seem so daunting. My spirit was lifted. I was humbled..Freer.