And these are the days of our lives...
Laney’s new name is “Feces Face.” I can’t help it because apparently…she can’t, either. Right after Andy jumped in the shower at 10:30 last night, I yelled for the dogs to come inside. Since it had been raining, I attempted to herd the troublesome trio onto the front porch. Quickly, Copper flew around the house. Shocking. He was visibly soaked and looked quite happy as he smacked his tail against me, making sure to bury his left front paw on my foot. Next, Laney and Mocha scrambled around the front yard, Mocha bashed into Laney like a punching bag. Poor Laney, I momentarily thought as she thrusted herself past Mocha to get to the porch.
Then, it hit me. The pungent smell ferociously garbled any free, clean air I previously enjoyed. As I stood on the edge of the porch, in a t-shirt, beckoning Mocha while she bobbed her head from side to side, Copper silently snuck back outside. Nearly gagging, I yelled, “Get in here! It’s raining!” And both dogs leapt inside. As I slammed the door closed, I turned to see Mocha staring at Laney, whining and moving back and forth. I moved towards the door to the house and as I did, I looked at Laney. Something hung from the right side of her neck.
“Andy! There’s something wrong with Laney. She has something hanging off of her head, “I yelled. “Oh great,” he said as he entered the porch. A few seconds later, I heard, “It’s FECES!” There we were. Andy in his underwear, me in a t-shirt that ironically, “Give a shirt,” and three wet dogs - one with poop on her head.
It was 10:45 at night and Laney was being hustled into the bathtub. Forty minutes later, we emerged. While I swept, Andy mopped. While I loaded the washing machine with dirty, wet, poop enhanced towels, Andy mopped again. While I sprayed Lysol, Andy disinfected the sink. Sixty minutes later, we made it to bed. At 5:30, I woke up shivering because the power had gone out from the wind. Andy scrambled to start the generator and I set my cell phone to wake me in another hour. As I snuggled back under the covers, I thought, “My next T-Shirt is going to say, ‘Pooped on’.”
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In honor of my husband the Navy Man
A U.S. Navy Admiral was attending a naval conference that included Admirals from the U.S. , English, Canadian, Australian and French Navies. At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a large group of officers that included personnel from most of those countries. Everyone was chatting away in English as they sipped their drinks but a French admiral suddenly complained that, 'Whereas Europeans learn many languages, Americans learn only English.' He then asked, 'Why is it that we always have to speak English in these conferences rather than speaking French?'
Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied, 'Maybe it's because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have to speak German.'
You could have heard a pin drop...
Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied, 'Maybe it's because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have to speak German.'
You could have heard a pin drop...
Teachers and Educators
According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.Every night the maintenance man would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back.Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night (you can just imagine the yawns from the little princesses).To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it.Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.There are teachers .... and then there are educators.
He Would Not Stay for Me, and Who Can Wonder?
He would not stay for me, and who can wonder?
He would not stay for me to stand and gaze.
I shook his hand, and tore my heart in sunder,
And went with half my life about my ways.
A.E. Housman
He would not stay for me to stand and gaze.
I shook his hand, and tore my heart in sunder,
And went with half my life about my ways.
A.E. Housman
Small Moments
From John F. Kennedy
We dare not forget today that we are the heirs of that first revolution. Let the word go forth from this time and place, to friend and foe alike, that the torch has been passed to a new generation of Americans—born in this century, tempered by war, disciplined by a hard and bitter peace, proud of our ancient heritage—and unwilling to witness or permit the slow undoing of those human rights to which this Nation has always been committed, and to which we are committed today at home and around the world.
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